Cow, Dog, and Man

Dog: Hey, Cow, holy or unholy, I hate you!
Cow: Why do you hate me?
Dog: Because I am loyal, I am kind and cute, but you, oh dear god, why do you get all the attention, all the love! I hate you! Hate, hate, hate! Bow-bow, bow!
Cow: Ammbaaaaa!
Dog: Don’t call your man! All men discriminate! Their best friend – a dog! To hell with men!
Cow: Ammbaaaaa!
Man: What troubles you, darling cow!
Cow: The dog hates me!
Dog: Bow… Bow-bow!
Cow: Ammbaaaaa!
Man: We men love you, cow! Don’t cry, don’t cry!
Dog: Bow… Bow-bow… bow, bow!

The man and the cow ganged up against the dog. The man decided to ship the dog to China (to be consumed in their popular Yulin festival), but the cow had more more intelligence than the man and the cow made more sense. The cow suggested that instead of transporting the dog to China (a foreign country) which would incur heavy transportation cost, it would be better to send it to Nagaland (which, whether some of the Nagas like it or not, is within India) where dog meat is as much a delicacy as it is in China! The man agreed and the dog was never heard of again.

Copyright © 2017 RAMU DAS

The Man, The Woman, And The Conditions

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man/woman in possession of a good fortune (or not; be you a pauper) must be in want of a wife/husband, and, since everything is fair in love and war, one learns to compromise on matters he/she should not compromise. The suppressed ways of leading our lives, apparently, defying all reasons, becomes the norms of our society.

Well, then, let me be so bold as to put forth the following questions:

  • Why should a man be the ‘Head of the family’ and why does he make all the major decisions in the family?
  • Why should the groom’s family ask for (or, rather, demand) dowry? (Take the woman and have dowry too. Ha!Ha!Ha! Not a good thing to do, is it?)
  • When a man is in the company of some women, why does she (the women he is in love with or married to) have so many problems and fire hundreds and thousands of silly questions on the poor innocent man? (Darling, have some mercy; take it easy; these women are just sisters, friends, colleagues…relax, they won’t take your lover away from you.)
  • Why do some women (I mean ‘some’) behave as if all men are alike (no, no, sweetheart, your lover is not a dog… can’t bark, no tail to wag), as if men’s heart are made of stone (or Ambuja Cement) and cannot be broken? (Honey, we, just like you, have a heart. We don’t easily cry – some of us haven’t mastered that skill yet – but you cannot expect us to be strong all the time. We break, we break!)
  • In arranged marriages, why should a government job holder given preference over a person who works at a private company?
  • Why does the look and the affluence level of a person matter more than what he/she is truly capable of? (please, give the good-hearted man a chance!)
  • After marriage, why can’t men change their surname and add the women’s surname in their (men’s) names instead of vice versa?
  • Why can’t a woman share her feelings as freely as a man does; why do women expect men to be the initiator? (go ahead, all ye pretty ladies, say what’s in your mind; have the heart to propose to the person you secretly admire.)

Sometimes, I think, it is worth challenging and breaking free from the shackles of tradition.

Copyright © 2015 RAMU DAS

Love Not Confessed

And she would ask me why I write about love.
Is love the only subject I have known?
Why not I write about sparrows and tiger and dove?
Love is love, I tell her, and don’t you moan.

I know very little than love as such.
I think of thoughts and my heart unfold,
Many a tests against me she would hold.
I try to tell her that I love her much.

Keenly I glance at her and I do see:
She thinks not of this man but many a man.
Oh, she thinks of men better than me!
Ah, how do I confess my love for her then?

Love for Arts

Copyright © 2012 RAMU DAS