Being Generous

Without giving it would be absolutely foolish to expect. Without giving it is hard to make friends. When you give you increase your value, at least to the taker’s eyes, and they respect you. You are esteemed, and you feel good about it and try to be more generous.

We don’t find many givers, but look and you will find multitudes of takers everywhere. You just have to be ready to give and you will have a taker, and one more, and more. Some takers would possibly take away whatever they can even from a blind beggar if they get the chance; such is the urge of takers.

Disappointment comes when you give and give and lose count of the number of times you give, but never ever get anything back. I like to give. If I’m capable of giving – be it book, be it money, and whatever – I just give. Now, it may sound as if I’m bragging for being generous, (it does, ha!) but I’m merely saying what I really do.

Once, after my shift in the office, I went out with a Senior Team Leader of our organization. He said he would drop me home in his car. His car was parked in a public area and he had to pay for it. He asked me to pay it. Without thinking twice I did it. Then he wanted to booze; he asked me if I wanted to drink. At first, I declined to drink, but I raised no objection if he drank. Nevertheless, he insisted on and on, that I should drink. Giving up, “Mild beer,” I said finally.

So we drank. I had only one beer, and he gulped down glasses after glasses of all the drinks he could name. And he could name a lot of them, mind you. When the waiter arrived with the bill, the Team Leader directed the waiter’s attention to my side and excused himself saying, “My bladder is going to burst, I wonder where the washroom is!”

Ha! That was funny, wasn’t that? I didn’t mind that a bit. But what disappointed me was when we met in the office the next day and he exclaimed he would return the amount I paid the other day. The amount I paid wasn’t small; small it maybe for him, but for me it was not. It has been 4 months and he is still returning the amount!

It has happened with me: people ask me for something; and I think I’m obligated to them. I move heaven and earth just to give them what they ask for. But, unlike some of my friends, I return what I take. Yes, I, the fool, return. This is not something to be proud of, but a conduct from which I cannot turn my head away.

The takers might be right in not giving what belongs to you from their perspective. Perhaps they think they become the rightful owner of the property, your property that is, once they get hold of it and the thought of returning it never strikes them; or, the thought may strike, but they just want to ignore all such thoughts.

Generosity, surely, is a very good quality, but always giving and never receiving anything in return is sheer stupidity.  I say getting anything in return in the sense getting your own stuff back, as well as something that other ought to give you instead of just taking from you. But, without being asked one would hardly give you anything. How long can you let others take advantage of you?  When the takers cross all their limits it is better to distance yourself from such a person/friend, takers that is.

We should never hesitate to give away whatever we can to those who cannot afford a single meal a day, and when we do give to such a person we should not expect something in return. So, mind whom you give and whom you should give. I would write more on this in the next post.

Copyright © 2013 RAMU DAS

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2 comments on “Being Generous

  1. You make a good point that being generous and being taken for granted are not the same thing. I think it’s important we’re aware of who we are giving to and why… A big topic!

    • RAMU DAS says:

      Absolutely, we must be aware about that. Very rarely do I donate to NGOs, but every time I come across people who are in need, (mostly elderly person and women) I don’t hesitate to give away a little money.

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